The following is a brief summary of some of thoughts said over by R' Frand on the parshios this evening. I have attempted to reproduce these vorts to the best of my ability. Any perceived inconsistency is the result of my efforts to transcribe the shiur and should not be attributed to R' Frand.
The first vort R' Frand said this evening related to the death of Nadav & Avihu. He quoted the Da'as Zekeinim M'Baalei HaTosafos which asked - why is it that they died by being burnt internally, while Titus HaRasha went into the Kodesh HaKodashim in peace and left in peace?
Before answering the question, the Da'as Zekeinim quoted a pasuk (I am unfamiliar with its source) which states that the Bachurim were consumed by fire and the Besulos were not praised. The Bachurim are a reference to Nadav & Avihu - why did they die, because they did not praise the Besulos. How many young girls remained like agunos, waiting for Nadav & Avihu. Meanwhile they said, our uncle is the king, our father is the Kohain Gadol, another uncle is the Nasi and we are the Sganei Kohain Gadol - no girls are good enough for us....and they died without children.
R' Frand said that he is involved in Shidduchim and he sees how many boys and girls will go many years in the parsha of dating and will never find the right mate, because they are too selective. Similarly many parents will feel that no potential candidate is good enough for their child.
R' Frand said that he once spoke with the Skveir Rebbi about this and was told that the boys and girls need to cut their lists to one or two items. He said that for his children there is only one thing - they should marry a "Rebbishe Einikle."
R' Frand observed that we live in a generation where anything can be optimized (my word). He does not visit Starbucks, but he knows that you can get a coffee with many different infusions and options. Similarly when you buy a car there are so many options and choices.
With that mindset on customization, is it any surprise that those in the parsha have lists that are so long?
R' Frand said a second vort on Vayikra 16:18 which states וְיָצָ֗א אֶל־הַמִּזְבֵּ֛חַ אֲשֶׁ֥ר לִפְנֵֽי־יְהוָֹ֖ה וְכִפֶּ֣ר עָלָ֑יו. Rashi explains that the Kapparah being performed was the taking of the blood of the cow.
R' Frand quoted the Targum Yonasan Ben Uziel who cites the Gemara which discusses the prayer of the Kohain Gadol at the time. He would pray three things: (1) that the king would always be from the tribe of Yehuda; (2) the Jews would need to rely on one and other for financial support, and (3) that Hashem should not heed the prayer of those passing on the roads. The specific prayer of the passersby was that there should not be any rain which would make the roads muddy.
Buy why did this third item need to occupy the Kohain Gadol at the time that he was praying for much more loftier things?
R' Frand quoted the Sefer Bei Chiya which quotes the Divrei Yechezkel who comments on the pasuk (again I am unaware of the source) - far from my yeshua is what I am crying out for. He explains that people cry out for things that are not good for them and the reason their prayers are not answered is because they are asking for things that are not important.
This is the prayer of the passerby - asking on Yom Kippur that there be no rain so that the roads are not muddy during their travels? The Kohain Gadol in turn asks Hashem not to listen to the short sighted prayers by people for the trivialities they don't really need.
[Although not said by R' Frand, it appears to me that the two thoughts are linked. If only those in the parsha were not preoccupied by trivialities, maybe they would find their intended so much quicker].
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