The following is a brief summary of some of thoughts said over by R' Frand on the parsha this evening. I have attempted to reproduce these vorts to the best of my ability. Any perceived inconsistency is the result of my efforts to transcribe the shiur and should not be attributed to R' Frand.
In Bereishis 42:1, the Torah states "וַיַּ֣רְא יַֽעֲקֹ֔ב כִּ֥י יֶשׁ־שֶׁ֖בֶר בְּמִצְרָ֑יִם וַיֹּ֤אמֶר יַֽעֲקֹב֙ לְבָנָ֔יו לָ֖מָּה תִּתְרָאֽוּ" - Ya'akov saw that there was food in Egypt and Ya'akov told his sons, why do you appear satiated?
Rashi explains that in so doing, Ya'akov was saying to his sons - don't stand out and give the appearance that you have enough while everyone else does not have what to eat.
R' Frand linked this to a story involving R' Elyashiv. A man came to ask the Gadol HaDor a question - his friends were complaining about his old hat and he wanted to know whether he should get a new one as he did not feel that it looked so beat up. R' Elyashiv responded that he was a young boy he was brought to get a beracha from the Chafetz Chaim and your hat is nowhere as beat up as his was!
But having said that, he still advised the man to get a new hat. He explained that it is common to not want to be talked about, and that usually that relates to new, expensive or fancy items. However, being the talk of the town for something which is old and beat up is also not something that a person should wish for. Better to just get the new hat and people will stop talking about you altogether.
R' Frand said a second vort about the discussion between Ya'akov and Reuven in Bereishis 42:36-38 wherein Ya'akov rejects sending down Binyamin and Reuven makes the offer that Ya'akov could kill his two sons if Binyamin does not come back. To this Ya'akov answers "my son will not go down."
Rashi explains that in saying this, Ya'akov rejected Reuven's offer and thought his son was an idiot for even suggesting it, for aren't Reuven's sons his as well?
There is a Medrash which tells of how when people came to R' Tarfon to tell a vort, if he liked it he praised it as Kaftor V'Ferach. If he disliked it, he said - my son will not go down with you, quoting Ya'akov's words in Bereishis 42:38.
R' Frand quoted R' Bukspan who explains that Ya'akov did not verbally his thoughts that his son was an idiot, as it is not proper to ever call someone an idiot.
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