The following is a brief summary of some of thoughts said over by R' Frand on the parsha this evening. I have attempted to reproduce these vorts to the best of my ability. Any perceived inconsistency is the result of my efforts to transcribe the shiur and should not be attributed to R' Frand.
After the plague of עָרֹֽב, Pharaoh calls Moshe & Aharon and tells them that he is ready to allow the Jews to sacrifice to Hashem, albeit only in Egpyt (Shemos 8:21). Moshe then responds to Pharaoh in the next pasuk - וַיֹּ֣אמֶר משֶׁ֗ה לֹ֤א נָכוֹן֙ לַֽעֲשׂ֣וֹת כֵּ֔ן כִּ֚י תּֽוֹעֲבַ֣ת מִצְרַ֔יִם נִזְבַּ֖ח לַֽיהֹוָ֣ה אֱלֹהֵ֑ינוּ הֵ֣ן נִזְבַּ֞ח אֶת־תּֽוֹעֲבַ֥ת מִצְרַ֛יִם לְעֵֽינֵיהֶ֖ם וְלֹ֥א יִסְקְלֻֽנוּ.
R' Frand asked - how is it that Moshe was concerned about the Jews being stoned by the Egyptians for offering this sacrifice? Wouldn't Hashem have protected the Jews? In fact it almost seems like an affront to Hashem to even make this statement!
R' Frand enhanced his question by quoting R' Paam who cited a pasuk in Ezra, where Ezra HaSofer says that he called a fast because he is embarrassed to ask the king for help in protection from the army. After all, we have Hashem to protect us. So why is Moshe worried about the Egyptians attacking them, when Hashem can protect them.
R' Frand quoted the Chassam Sofer who explained that Moshe was not worried that the people would attack them. Instead, Moshe's concern was that it was לֹ֤א נָכוֹן֙ - its not right to do it in front of people, as its not Menschlich. Moshe's response to Pharaoh was - you have us pegged wrong, as we don't do this in front of people and make them feel bad.
R' Frand quoted a story about R' Paam's father who was the Rav of a city in Lithuania. While he ate gebrokts, he would only do so privately as he had members of the community who were Chassidim and did not eat that. Meanwhile, the prior Rav would show a bowl of Matza balls in the main thoroughfare. But R' Paam's father did not want people to feel bad. The lesson is respect others and don't make them feel bad.
R' Frand said a second vort from the Chassam Sofer as quoted in the Sefer Arzei HaParsha. The vort related to the pasuk in Shemos 6:13 - וַיְדַבֵּ֣ר יְהֹוָה֘ אֶל־משֶׁ֣ה וְאֶל־אַֽהֲרֹן֒ וַיְצַוֵּם֙ אֶל־בְּנֵ֣י יִשְׂרָאֵ֔ל וְאֶל־פַּרְעֹ֖ה מֶ֣לֶךְ מִצְרָ֑יִם לְהוֹצִ֥יא אֶת־בְּנֵֽי־יִשְׂרָאֵ֖ל מֵאֶ֥רֶץ מִצְרָֽיִם.
R' Frand noted that this is the pasuk which precedes the Makkos. Rashi explains that Hashem was telling Moshe & Aharon to be patient with the Jewish people during this time and to show respect to Pharaoh when they dealt with him.
R' Frand asked - why is it that they are receiving the instruction to show respect now? They had already visited with Pharaoh and spoke with him previously! Additionally the pasuk implies that because they were treat Pharaoh with respect, it would allow them to take the Jews out of Egypt. But what is the connection?
The Chassam Sofer explains that embarrassment can atone for one's sins. And this is the easiest form of atonement, rather than suffer physical or financial injury. Hashem was telling them, if you don't show respect and you embarrass him, I won't be able to bring down these punishments on him. Don't let your emotions control you, treat him with respect so that I am able to punish him.
R' Frand connected this with a story about a couple who had problems conceiving and were childless after 20 years of marriage. They went to R' Chaim Kanievsky and after listening, he told them that perhaps that was what was meant to be. They went back and asked for an Eitza and he said - get a beracha from someone who was publicly embarrassed and did not answer back.
At some point later they were at a Bar Mitzva where a woman was publicly humiliated by someone calling her a thief in connection with an apartment. The woman had been taken to a Din Torah and prevailed, yet here she was being called a thief at a Bar Miztva. The couple ran over to her and said - please don't answer back. She complied and they asked her for a Beracha of being able to have children. She gave them the Beracha and after 21 years of marriage they had a child.
R' Frand remarked that he has told that story several times, but he has a proof to it from Chumash. In Parsha Vayeitzei, Rachel asks Leah for the Duda'im that her son had brought her. In response, Leah says to Rachel in Bereishis 30:15 - הַֽמְעַט֙ קַחְתֵּ֣ךְ אֶת־אִישִׁ֔י וְלָקַ֕חַת גַּ֥ם אֶת־דּֽוּדָאֵ֖י בְּנִ֑י.
Rachel could have answered back - your husband? He was mine and was supposed to marry me first, but our father switched us. And, in order to prevent you from being humiliated - I gave you the signs that Ya'akov had taught me. So how can you say I took your husband?
But Rachel did not say anything...and eight pesukim later she gave birth to Yosef.
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