The following is a brief summary of some of thoughts said over by R' Frand on the parsha this evening. I have attempted to reproduce these vorts to the best of my ability. Any perceived inconsistency is the result of my efforts to transcribe the shiur and should not be attributed to R' Frand.
R' Frand began the vort by quoting Rashi on the pasuk in Bereishis 29:25 - וַיְהִ֣י בַבֹּ֔קֶר וְהִנֵּה־הִ֖וא לֵאָ֑ה in which Rashi quotes the Medrash that Rochel gave the signs to Leah so that Leah would not be embarrassed when Ya'akov realized that he had married Leah instead of Rochel.
R' Frand then quoted the Gemara in Megillah 13b in which the Gemara states that as a reward for the Tznius of Rochel, she was zoche to have Shaul HaMelech as a descendant.
R' Frand said that this Gemara has bothered him for a long time. We see that what Rochel did was an act of chessed as she saved her sister from humiliation. In fact, there is a famous Medrash on Eicha which underscores the act of chessed. In this oft quoted Medrash, the patriarchs individually prayed that Hashem would end the galus. This began with Avraham praying and saying that in the z'chus of his sacrificing Yitzchak, Hashem should end the galus and Hashem said, no. Yitzchak then prayed and said that the galus should end in the z'chus that he did not challenge his father over the akeidah and Hashem said, no. Ya'akov too prayed and asked for the end of galus in the z'chus of his actions in the house of Lavan and Hashem said, no. Even Moshe prayed and asked that the galus end in the z'chus that he led the Jews in the desert for 40 years and Hashem said, no. Until Rochel prayed and said that the galus should end in the z'chus that she gave her sister the signs and helped her trick Ya'akov so that Leah would not be embarrassed, and for this Hashem agreed that there would be an end.
So while its clear that Rochel showed kindness to her sister, where is the Tzinius component?
Before answering the question, R' Frand quoted one more pasuk in the parsha. After Rochel asked Leah for the dudaim that Reuven found, Leah says to Rochel in 30:15 - וַתֹּ֣אמֶר לָ֗הּ הַֽמְעַט֙ קַחְתֵּ֣ךְ אֶת־אִישִׁ֔י וְלָקַ֕חַת גַּ֥ם אֶת־דּֽוּדָאֵ֖י בְּנִ֑י. R' Frand was bothered by this pasuk as how can Leah have the temerity to say to Rochel that she had taken Leah's husband. Didn't Leah know that Ya'akov was originally supposed to marry Rochel?
R' Frand quoted the sefer Ohr Reuven which offers an incredible insight into what happened before the first wedding night. It is a well known Medrash that the signs were actually halachos - Ya'akov taught Rochel the halachos of Niddah, Challah and Hadlakas HaNer. The Ohr Reuven writes that when Ya'akov taught these halachos to Rochel it was not meant to be a sign to avoid Lavan's trickery. Rather, Yaa'kov said to Rochel - these are important halachos that a Jewish woman must know. On the night we are to marry, I will test you on these halachos. If you pass, we will go forward with the wedding.
Following this event, Rochel taught the halachos to Leah and told her - one day you will get married and it is important that you know these halachos. She did not tell Leah that Ya'akov had said that he would test her on them. All that Leah knew was that these were important halachos to learn. And on the wedding night, she aced the test, albeit without knowing that these halachos were meant to be Rochel's quiz. This was the tznius of Rochel, she passed the information on to Leah without Leah even knowing that this was meant for Rochel.
This is also why Leah was able to say with a straight face that Rochel had taken her husband. Leah never knew that Rochel was to be the first wife. All she knew was that her father told her that she was marrying Ya'akov and that she passed the quiz.
R' Frand closed the vort by reiterating a thought from Kelem that he had said in his Teshuva Derasha - there is no comparison between a mitzva done in public and the same mitzva done privately that no one knows about.
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